Angry!

I have a dear friend I meet with regularly.  He's an adult dealing with severe mental illness.  It became a real problem for him after university and a degree in robotics.  Now he's living with elderly parents, trying to think well and live a normal life....but it's hard.

The little things we do naturally, the things we don't even think about are ongoing battles for him.

This morning I got this e-mail from him.  It's honest, but he's angry!  Here are his words,

"Mike, Thomas here...

Mom and dad have $25 in their checkbook...

Mom and dad refuse to let me ask family for the money we need...

and they refuse to ask from family money they need that mom and dad need badly..

I'm just plain angry about it...

God is forcing me to trust him like mom and dad trust God and it happens every month...

I'm just plain angry about it..."

Now that's honest!  I was humored that he's angry because God is making him trust.  None of us want to do that, do we?  We want bank accounts full of money, cabinets full of food.  We don't want to stretch our faith.  And when it happens we become angry at God.

At least Thomas is honest about it.  And yet, when we are forced to trust God with our lack we are so much richer for it.  Whether we have enough or not our faith grows and our eyes are on God for what we need.  

I wish we were as honest as Thomas when times like this happen for us.  To be able to say to God, "I'm mad at you because...." is the most wonderful place you could be.  In those moments you are forced to talk to him, trust him and let go of your own security.

Lord, first, take care of my friend and his parents. And then, in each of our lives, stretch us to trust you when all we have is a loaf of bread and one stick of butter in the cabinet.