When will I ever learn?

One of my favorite songs is from a Van Morrison album called "Avalon Sunset."  On that album is a song titled, "When will I ever learn to live in God."  A part of the song is this chorus,

When will I ever learn

to live in God

When will I ever learn

He gave me everything

I need and more

When will I ever learn

I think I like the song because it speaks to my own struggle for contentment, a rest in God for what I have, where I am, who I am, how I look....and so much more.  For me contentment is my most elusive quest.  I want to be content, but.....

I want to be content with what I have, but there is always something new I really "need."  

I want to be content with how I look, but somehow I'm overweight and going bald!  How did that happen? So when I look in the mirror I'm never content with the old fat bald guy staring back at me.  Who is that and how did I become THAT guy?  I really don't like the me I am.

I want to be content with my job, but.....

Well, you can see where this is going.  I could wax eloquent for hours and pages in all the ways I am not getting what I want or what I think I "need."  So something has to change....

Either I have to find contentment in who I am, what I have,  how I look, where I work, the task God has given me or eternally be on a quest for more.

I am extremely tired of the quest for more.  Even after I get it there is more beyond that!  There's never enough!!!  And then you have to pay for it all!  

When will I ever learn to live in God?  When will I EVER learn?  He gave me everything I need and more, when will I ever learn?

And so this morning I am focusing on a new quest, but one I have pursued often.  Today, once more, I want to find contentment in him.  He provides all I need, all I could ever want.  I'm so blessed already, how could I ever be discontent?  But I struggle with it often.  What an insult that is to God who provides for me.

When will I ever learn?  I may never get this, but once more today I'm laying aside the "need" for more and seeking my all in Him.

Solomon wrote these words for such a battle as this,

"Everything is wearisome beyond description. No matter how much we see, we are never satisfied. No matter how much we hear, we are not content."

Lord, help me to find all I need in YOU today.  Help me to learn you are all I need.